June 07, 2005

Military Advice

I'm now working on a military project; this came around in our e-mail today.


"Aim towards the Enemy."
- Instruction printed on U.S. Rocket Launcher


"When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend."
- U.S. Army


"Cluster bombing from B-52s is very, very accurate. The bombs are guaranteed to always hit the ground."
 - U.S.A.F. Ammo Troop


"If the enemy is in range, so are you."
- Infantry Journal


"A slipping gear could let your M203 grenade launcher fire when you least expect it.  That would make you quite unpopular in what's left of your unit."
- Army's magazine of preventive maintenance


"It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed."
- U.S. Air Force Manual


"Try to look unimportant; they may be low on ammo."
- Infantry Journal


"Tracers work both ways."
- U.S. Army Ordnance


"Five-second fuses only last three seconds."
- Infantry Journal


"Bravery is being the only one who knows you're afraid."
- Col. David Hackworth


"If your attack is going too well, you're probably walking into an ambush."
- Infantry Journal


"Any ship can be a minesweeper  ... once."
- Anonymous


"Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do."
- Unknown Army Recruit


"Don't draw fire; it irritates the people around you."
- Your Buddies


(And lastly)


"If you see a bomb technician running, try to keep up with him."
-U.S. Ammo Troop

Posted by Will Duquette at June 7, 2005 08:18 PM